Light

One night as he sat at his table head on hands he saw himself rise and go. One night or day. For when his own light went out he was not left in the dark. Light of a kind came from the one high window. Under it still the stool on which till he could or would no more he used to mount to see the sky. Why he did not crane out to see what lay beneath was perhaps because the window was not made to open or because he could or would not open it. Perhaps he knew only too well what lay beneath and did not wish to see it again. So he would simply stand there high above the earth and see through the clouded pane the cloudless sky. Its faint unchanging light unlike any light he could remember from the days and nights when day followed hard on night and night on day. This outer light then when his own went out became his only light till it in its turn went out and left him in the dark. Till it in its turn went out.

— Beckett, from ‘Stirrings Still’

Transcendence

Transcendence is passing over to being’s other, otherwise than being. Not to be otherwise, but otherwise than being. And not to not-be; passing over is not here equivalent to dying. Being and not-being illuminate one another, and unfold a speculative dialectic which is a determination of being. Or else the negativity which attempts to repel being is immediately submerged by being. The void that hollows out is immediately filled with the mute and anonymous rustling of the there is, as the place left vacant by one who died is filled with the murmur of the attendants.

— Levinas, Otherwise than Being or Beyond Essence (trans. A. Lingis)

A dream

I dreamed I was on a trip I’d never taken, spellbound by a desert landscape I’d only read about, when the sand wiped away my tracks and made me look around in panic. But what does panic mean in a dream, I tried to reason. So let me be wind and sand, I asked, let me be sand in wind.

Vertigo

1
In the past I thought of myself as living into the future, as a creature of continuity moving through the present, through a succession of presents. The future was a condition of possibility that was separate from me in time, that I could imagine and bring about. It gave me space to master myself.

2
And now, in the present? This moment calls to me like an abyss in time. A hesitation before birth. An anxiety.

3
But there’s a pure joy in this, somewhere. I sit myself at my desk, dispersed, waiting for it to lend itself to me.

The veil

More and more my language appears to me like a veil which one has to tear apart in order to get to those things (or the nothingness) lying behind it. Grammar and style! To me they seem to have become as irrelevant as a Biedermeier bathing suit or the imperturbability of a gentleman. A mask. […] To drill one hole after another into [language] until that which lurks behind, be it something or nothing, starts seeping through — I cannot imagine a higher goal for today’s writer.

— Beckett, Letters

Responding

Naming the possible, responding to the impossible. Responding does not consist in formulating an answer, in such a way as to appease the question that would obscurely come from such a region; even less in transmitting, in the manner of an oracle, a few truth contents of which the daytime world would not yet have knowledge. It is poetry’s existence, each time it is poetry, that in itself forms a response and, in this response, attends to what it addressed to us in impossibility (by turning itself away). Poetry does not express this, does not say it, does not draw it under the attraction of language. But it responds. Every beginning speech begins by responding; a response to what is not yet heard, an attentive response in which the impatient waiting for the unknown and the desiring hope for presence are affirmed.

— Blanchot, ‘How To Discover the Obscure’ (trans. S. Hanson)

A miracle of poetic prose

Which one of us, in his moments of ambition, has not dreamed of a miracle of poetic prose, musical without rhythm and without rhyme, supple enough and rugged enough to adapt itself to the lyrical impulses of the soul, the undulations of reverie, the jibes of conscience?

— Baudelaire, Paris Spleen

No one was around

‘”I” is this epiphany of absence‘. When I glanced up and saw the slanted old window in the condemned building. The space inside that seemed to recede as I looked into it. The alley itself was sunny and filled with windborne seeds. No one was around, including me. ‘I’ was thankful echoes of my surroundings.

Not myself

‘I’m not myself today.’ Pregnant phrase. Who then?

To change myself

I write partly in order to change myself; it’s an instrument I use.

— Susan Sontag